My Spouse Doesn’t Know If They Want To Do Divorce Mediation and Won’t Come to the Initial Consultation!

So you and your spouse have made the tough decision that you want to get divorced, but that’s all that you’ve decided (because now you’re not speaking to each other). You’re proactive so you look into some options to get divorced and you come across a handsome attorney’s website that offers divorce mediation. After checking out the website you think divorce mediation will be the best option for you and your spouse. You tell your spouse that you want to set up a consultation for the two of you, but your spouse doesn’t want to come or participate. Now what?

It’s definitely preferred that both spouses attend the initial consultation so they can both get an idea of the process, meet the mediator, and have enough information to jointly decide if divorce mediation is right for them. The mediator also needs to evaluate both parties. So in order for the divorce mediation to proceed both parties have to be on board. But, I have had situations where only one spouse attends the initial consultation. It’s not the end of the world. In those instances, the information that is provided during the consultation is relayed to the other spouse and I’ve also let them know that if they have any questions they can reach out to me directly to help them make a decision.

Ultimately, if your spouse doesn’t want to participate in the divorce mediation, but you still want to get divorced then one spouse would need to file for the divorce with the court to start the divorce case. From there they have a couple of options: (1) they can represent themselves, (2)hire an attorney, or (3) get limited scope representation. Limited Scope Representation involves the attorney acting like a coach and consultant helping one spouse through each step in the divorce process that they agree to have the attorney help them with. It can be as little as preparing the paperwork to file with the divorce to start the divorce, and/or include preparing and responding to discovery, completing financial affidavits, filing motions for orders, prepping for hearings, and prepping for the final trial, or preparing the final agreement if the couple settle.

Our office offers limited scope representation for spouses who are representing themselves but still need some help from an attorney. The Limited Scope Representation model is a great option for controlling the costs associated with a contested divorce. If you are considering alternatives to going it alone and representing yourself, then please give us a call to discuss how Limited Scope Representation can help you navigate the divorce process.

Differences Between an Uncontested and Contested Divorce

Differences Between an Uncontested and Contested Divorce

Every divorce is not the same, and where a couple can resolve their divorce in an uncontested manner then that would be better for all parties involved.  Understanding some of the major differences between uncontested and contested divorces can help couples going through or considering divorce make the best decision for themselves and their family.

Why the Cause of the Marriage Breakdown Doesn't Really Matter.

Why the Cause of the Marriage Breakdown Doesn't Really Matter.

While it is important for divorcing parties to have an opportunity to state their peace during the divorce proceeding starting with what they allege on the divorce complaint, in practice it is rare that any specific reason is given for the breakdown of the marriage, and parties opt to just claim that the marriage has broken down irretrievably.  

There are nine fault ground that can be alleged in your divorce complaint.  The important thing to know is that when these grounds are alleged in the complaint, each element of the ground(s) has to be proven to the court’s satisfaction before the dissolution of marriage can be granted.  If you allege adultery for instance and you cannot prove all of the elements of adultery then there is a chance your divorce won’t be granted.

There is one other ground for divorce which is Irretrievable Breakdown.

Child Support and Your Divorce

Child Support and Your Divorce

For those of us with kids (me included) they bring so much joy into our lives, when they are not being jerks.  But we don’t hold that against them and we try our best to provide for them financially in every way.  When a divorcing couple has kids involved they have to consider how that child will be taken care of financially during and after the divorce.  Child support payments are a necessary topic that has to be addressed.  To have a better understanding of this topic so you can better prepare and participate in your mediation here are some important things to note about child support orders.  

Legal Separation and Why Would You Want One Instead of a Divorce

Legal Separation and Why Would You Want One Instead of a Divorce

If a divorce ends the marriage then a legal separation just pauses it, but with most of the same results of a dissolution such as division of property and providing for support orders.  The process to file fora legal separation is similar to a divorce, except it is started by filing a different complaint than you would in a divorce, and as I said before, the court can enter orders regarding support, debt allocation, and property division.  One important difference is that after you have completed the legal separation the court declares you legally separated and not divorced, so unlike a dissolution you are not able to remarry.

When is the Best Time to Start Divorce Mediation

When is the Best Time to Start Divorce Mediation

Ideally you would want to take as much time as you need to complete you divorce.  There are so many areas of your life that are impacted, and will be impacted so it is not something you want to be rushed into, or rushed through. 

You can start the divorce mediation at any time during your divorce, however if you have already filed for divorce then a clock has started ticking due to deadlines and statistical goals that the courts have when it comes to divorce.  

What to Expect At Your Final Uncontested Divorce Hearing

What to  Expect At Your Final Uncontested Divorce Hearing

So you are finally here.  The moment of truth.  Today is the day your divorce becomes final.  It’s an emotional time for you.  My goal is too alleviate some of those concerns by letting you know what to expect at your final hearing.  The scenario I’m going to describe is what happens at an uncontested divorce hearing in Connecticut, where the parties have come to an agreement on all issues.  Prior to the hearing you want to make sure that all of your paperwork has been completed, that you have come to an agreement, and that agreement has been put in writing, reviewed and signed by you and your spouse (That’s where a mediator like me comes in).

How Do You Get Divorced When You Don't Know Where Your Spouse Is

How Do You Get Divorced When You Don't Know Where Your Spouse Is

We’ve all heard the stories whether it's someone we know or something we’ve seen on tv or a movie, where a husband or wife goes out to the store for milk or cigarettes, and never comes back.  Now your situation may not be that cliche, but what happens when you are prepared to file for divorce but you don’t know where your spouse is.

Divorce Coaching/Divorce Consulting Attorneys (aka Unbundled Legal Services)

Divorce Coaching/Divorce Consulting Attorneys (aka Unbundled Legal Services)

There is a shift in legal services that is offering the option to pick the legal services you want, rather than retaining, and paying for an attorney to represent you through an entire case when you only need her for parts of your case.  In the area of family law, divorce coaching, also known as divorce consulting, is the solution for the self represented person who wants to handle their divorce on their own, but needs additional assistance in certain areas without retaining an attorney.